CHAPTER THIRTY
Though Nesa was greatly improved, she was still a little weak, so Daniel took her back to her room and insisted that she get some sleep. It had been a very long day, and Daniel was pretty tired. He and Sam went to his office. There, he found Jack perched on the corner of the desk, fiddling with one of the artifacts – which made the archeologist very nervous – and Danny asleep on the cot.
After plucking the artifact out of Jack's hands and returning it to its proper place, Daniel walked up to the cot. He ran a hand through the boy's hair.
"He conked off not long after you left," Jack said. "He was fighting it before then."
Daniel smiled. "Yeah, I know."
"It's really late, Daniel," Sam said. "You look tired. You need to go home and get some sleep."
The archeologist nodded.
"And don't worry about getting here bright and early in the morning," Jack added. "Sleep in. You've earned it."
"Earned it? I didn't do anything, Jack."
"That's not what I heard. From what I've been told, you're the one who convinced Nesa that Tretonin was the way to go."
Daniel shook his head. "I just told her that she didn't need a symbiote to be a warrior like her sister . . . and almost got my head blown off as a result."
Jack's eyebrows lifted. "Excuse me? You didn't mention anything about a near decapitation in the debriefing."
"Oh. Yeah. I sort of skimmed over that part."
"Well, I'd say it's time to dive into those little details. I'd sort of like to know when a teammate nearly loses his head."
Daniel told them about the incident with Neith. Sam was alarmed at how close Daniel came to getting killed.
"Don't tell Danny," the archeologist requested. "He doesn't need to know." His teammates agreed.
After changing into his civvies, Daniel gathered the sleeping child into his arms and carried him to the elevator. Sam accompanied them, intending to head home as well.
The archeologist looked over at her. He'd learned from her that she and Mala had spent some time talking. She had told him about the tragic event in the woman's life.
"I'm really sorry about Mala," he said. "She seemed like a good person."
Sam sighed. "She wanted her people to be free of the Goa'uld so badly. I asked Janet if she thought that we could have saved Mala if we'd put the symbiote back in sooner, when Janet first wanted to. She thinks that the same thing would have happened."
"Does she have any idea why it happened?"
Sam shook her head. "She can't do an autopsy. Ishta would not allow it, considering it a violation of the body. She can only assume that the symbiote reacted badly to the presence of Tretonin in Mala's body, which caused Mala to go into cardiac arrest. It could be because she had such a high amount of it in her system. Janet said that, in the future, if someone doesn't respond to the Tretonin within a reasonable amount of time, we won't keep upping the dosage. That's probably where we went wrong."
"At least Mala is getting what she wanted. After we left the infirmary, Ishta said that she would do all she could to convince the rest of the Hak'tyl to take the Tretonin. Ka'lel has already said that she wants to begin taking it. She's going to be taking Mala's place as one of Ishta's lieutenants."
Sam nodded. "I talked to her for a little while."
The elevator stopped on the eleventh floor. They got off and went to the desk at the other elevator, signing out. Then they resumed their trip upward.
Sam smiled. "She seems to have a pretty high opinion of you."
"Who?"
"Ka'lel."
"She does?"
"That's definitely the impression I got." Sam's gaze turned searching. "She said that you told the Hak'tyl you had more respect for me than you had words to express."
Daniel nodded. "Yes, I did, and I meant it. I have always respected you, Sam, as a scientist, as a woman and as a soldier. Sorry, I mean as an airman, uh . . . airwoman? Anyway, I know that I haven't told you that in so many words, but it is true."
Sam's smile returned. "Thank you. It means a lot to hear you say that." Her smile turned mischievous. "She also said that you spilled the beans about that time I decked the colonel."
Daniel groaned. "I knew I shouldn't have told them that. If Jack finds out, he'll kill me."
Grinning, Sam leaned into him. "Don't worry. If he tries, I'll just deck him again." Then she gave him a kiss.
After they got off the elevator, Sam walked with Daniel to his car. He put Danny in the back seat, then straightened and turned to her. He pulled her into his arms, resting his head on her hair, eyes closed.
"I love you," he said.
Sam pulled back a little and gave him another kiss. "And I love you. I can't wait for our third date."
"Me neither. We'll have to make some plans for it."
"Yes, we will." They kissed again. "Sleep well, Daniel."
"You too."
Daniel got in the car and pulled out of the parking space, heading for home.
Daniel's first stop the next morning was to visit Nesa. Danny went with him.
"Hey," Daniel greeted with a smile. "How are you doing?"
"I am well," the girl replied. "Doctor Fraiser said that I may leave here."
"That's great."
Nesa's eyes went to Danny.
"Nesa, this is Danny."
"Hi," the boy said a little shyly.
"Hello." Nesa looked up at Daniel. "He is your son?"
"No."
"Your brother, then?"
"Um, no, not that either."
The girl's expression turned puzzled. "But the resemblance."
"Uh, yeah. There's a very good reason for that."
"Can I tell her?" Danny asked.
"Sure."
Danny turned back to Nesa. "I'm a clone," he announced, almost sounding proud of it. "I'm Daniel's clone."
Nesa's eyes widened. She stared at the boy, then looked up at Daniel. "He is you?"
"He's a clone of me. It's a very long story."
The girl's gaze returned to Danny. "I have been told of cloning, but I have never known anyone who was cloned. Is this common on Earth?"
"No. Actually, Danny is one of only two on the planet. Like I said, it's a very long story."
Nesa was released from the infirmary a few minutes later. They went to visit Neith, who was doing much better, having responded well to the Tretonin. It would be a couple of days before she was well enough to leave, however.
Neith gazed at the little boy beside her sister. Daniel made introductions.
"Daniel told me you got hurt. Are you feeling better now?" Danny asked the woman.
Surprised by the question, Neith replied, "Yes, I am. I am feeling much stronger. Are you Daniel Jackson's son?"
Danny grinned and shook his head, looking as if he was all prepared to launch into another announcement of who he was.
"May I tell her?" Nesa asked.
Danny looked at her. "Okay." He decided that would be just as much fun.
Neith was stunned when her sister told her who and what Danny was and studied both man and child closely. The striking resemblance removed any doubt she might have of the truth of the story.
They spoke with Neith for a while longer, then went to the commissary for breakfast. Most of the food was unfamiliar to Nesa, so Danny explained what each thing was, telling her what tasted good, what tasted okay, and what tasted "yucky." Nesa steered clear of the stuff Danny labeled "yucky."
While they ate, Danny asked Nesa about the Hak'tyl, filled with curiosity about them. The girl was a bit shy to talk about it at first, having no experience talking with male children, but was soon telling Danny all about the lives of the Hak'tyl. Danny, in turn, talked about his and Daniel's parents and their adventures on digs.
"All that really didn't happen to me," Danny explained at one point. "It really happened to Daniel when he was a little kid. But I have all the memories he did when he was my age, so it's like it really did happen to me."
Nesa looked at Daniel, a question in her eyes.
"Danny was physically eight years old when he was removed from the machine that cloned him," he told her, guessing that was what she was asking. "He was given the memories I had at that age. And, no, we weren't the ones who cloned him."
"The Cedarnans did," Danny supplied. "They didn't have very many children because something in the water made it so that it was hard for them to have kids. They cloned people so that they'd have more children."
"And they chose to clone you?" Nesa asked Daniel.
"Yes, though I didn't know it at the time. We found out, and I took Danny."
"But it's okay because we fixed it so that they'll be able to have more kids now," Danny said. "They won't be cloning any more people."
The three of them finished their breakfast, then Daniel took Nesa to the VIP room that she'd be staying in until she, Neith, Ishta and Ka'lel returned home. Ka'lel was presently undergoing the Tretonin treatments and was responding well. Ishta was following the procedure as part of her training in how to administer the drug.
"Would you like me to stay and keep you company?" Danny asked the girl in her room.
Surprised, Nesa didn't know what to say.
"I think that's a great idea," Daniel said. "How about if we get your computer, and you can show it to Nesa? You can teach her how to play some of the games."
Danny liked that idea a lot and went with Daniel to his office to get the laptop.
Nesa was intrigued by the computer. Living with the Hak'tyl, she had very little experience with technology other than staff weapons and a few other items. Things like computers were unknown to her, except what she'd been told in her schooling.
Because she couldn't read English, she couldn't play the educational games, so Danny taught her how to play a racing car game. The Jaffa girl was soon having a lot of fun driving the brightly colored car through the fantasy world, though she had as much fun crashing it into trees and boulders as she did keeping it on the road. Every time she did that, Danny added his own crashing sounds to the ones in the game. Soon, Nesa was doing the same. Everyone passing by the room often heard laughter.
Once they were tired of the game, Danny took it upon himself to start teaching Nesa how to write hieroglyphs.
"Mom and Dad taught me how to read and write them," he told her as they began.
"Where are your parents now?" Nesa asked. "Do they still live?"
Danny's happy mood vanished. He stared down at the paper before him. "They got killed." His voice dropped further. "I saw it."
The news saddened Nesa. She had begun to really like the boy, seeing him as a friend. "I am sorry."
"It wasn't really me who saw it, but I remember it like it was." Danny started toying with the sheet of paper. "I miss them a lot." He looked at Nesa. "Do you miss your Mom and Dad? Daniel said that they weren't allowed to keep you because of the laws of your people."
Nesa stared at the boy, realizing that he didn't know the truth about Moloc. All children of the Hak'tyl knew about the sacrifices and how they had been saved. But this little boy was not one of them, and it had apparently been decided that he should not know the truth.
"I do not remember them," Nesa said. "I was just a baby when I was taken by Neith." She paused. "But I sometimes wonder what it would have been like to know them. Neith was almost like my mother when I was very young, but I wonder what having a father is like."
"My dad was great. When I was little, he'd ride me on his shoulders and swing me around in the air." Danny smiled. "Sometimes, he hung me upside-down while Mom tickled me."
Hearing the boy speak of his father made Nesa wish that she could have experienced such joy. "He sounds nice."
Thinking about the happy times with his parents made Danny start to cry. He didn't want Nesa to think he was a baby, so he tried to hide it, but the girl noticed. Tears were not something that the children of the Hak'tyl shed very often, having been taught to be strong, but Nesa had cried in private more than once.
The girl didn't know what she should do. Awkwardly, she reached a hand out to the boy, drawing it back before touching him. She stared at Danny a moment longer, then reached for him again, this time touching his shoulder. He kept his face hidden from her.
Nesa remembered a time when she was feeling very sad, and Neith had drawn her close, holding her tight until the sorrow went away. Tentatively, she put her arm around Danny's shoulders, pulling him a little closer. After a moment, he leaned against her.
"You think I'm a baby, don't you," he mumbled.
"No. Why would I think that?"
"I try not to cry about Mom and Dad anymore, except when I have the nightmares. Daniel said it was okay to cry, but I don't want him to be worried about me and to be sad because I am, so I try not to cry, and I don't let him see when I do. I don't let Uncle Jack, Sam, Teal'c or Grandpa George see either, cus they'd tell him."
Nesa gazed at the boy. So, she was not the only one who hid her tears. "I do not let Neith see me cry either."
Danny glanced up at her. "You don't?"
"No. I want her to think that I am strong. I will be a great warrior like her someday, and warriors must be strong."
"But warriors can cry. Sam is kind of a warrior because she's in the Air Force, and she cries. I asked Teal'c if he cried when his wife died, and he said he did, and I bet Uncle Jack cried when his son died. You can cry and still be strong."
Unbeknownst to the children, someone was watching them. Daniel stared at them through the partly open door, his heart aching so badly that it physically hurt. He'd arrived just in time to hear Danny talk about hiding his tears from everyone. He'd had no idea that Danny was doing that, trying to spare him the pain of seeing the boy grieve. God, how could he have not known this? How could he have been so blind?
Tears of his own filling his eyes, Daniel silently closed the door and went to his office. He closed the doors and sat at the desk, cursing himself for being a fool and not seeing how much Danny was still suffering.
Resting his elbows on the desk, Daniel lowered his head into his hands. He didn't hear the soft knock on his door or, a moment later, the entrance of Jack into the room.
Jack was stunned and dismayed when he saw Daniel at his desk, looking like he was on the verge of tears. The colonel shut the door and hesitantly stepped forward.
"Daniel?" he inquired softly.
The archeologist jumped a mile, his head jerking up to look at Jack. He instantly looked away, wiping a finger across his eyes.
"Daniel, what's wrong? Has something happened?"
"I found out that I'm not the good parent Catherine thought I was," the younger man replied in a soft, sad voice. "I've let Danny down."
Having no clue what Daniel could be talking about, Jack wheeled a chair over and straddled it. "What are you talking about?"
Daniel told the older man what he'd just learned. Jack was upset by the news as well. Danny had hid this from all of them. Right now, though, it was Daniel who needed comforting.
"He kept this from all of us, Daniel. I didn't know either, and I'm betting that Carter, Teal'c and Hammond had no clue. This does not make you a bad parent."
"I should have known. I should have figured it out."
"Daniel, despite that telepathic link between you and Danny, you're not psychic. I know from experience that, when children really want to, they can be damn good at keeping things from us. Charlie once got a nasty cut on his arm doing something that I'd told him not to. He didn't tell me or Sara, hiding it from us even though he was hurting. He put band-aids on it and tried to wash the blood out of his shirt. When it wouldn't come clean, he threw it away. Sara found it in the trash. The cut needed several stitches. Afterwards, I told Charlie never to hide something like that from us again, that his safety and well-being were far more important than the fact that he'd disobeyed me."
Jack laid a hand on Daniel's shoulder. "You need to talk to him, Daniel, tell him that hiding his pain isn't right, that you want to know when he cries. And don't you dare feel guilty about this. What matters now is that you know and can do something about it." He shook his head. "That little kid is even more like you than I thought. This is just the kind of thing you do, hiding how much you're hurting from everyone, especially the people who care about you. And, before you say anything, yes, I know I do the same thing. It's a curse of being male, thinking we need to put on a strong face in front of everyone."
Daniel drew in an unsteady breath. "I guess we can be idiots sometimes."
"Oh yeah, something women are very well aware of and, no doubt, talk about at length with each other."
That got a faint smile out of Daniel.
"So, you going to be okay?" Jack asked, gazing at him intently.
Daniel nodded. "Yeah. Thanks. So, uh, what were you originally coming to see me about?"
"Nothing important. It'll keep."
"How are things going along with getting that child psychologist?"
"I don't know. You want me to ask?"
"No, I'll ask General Hammond. In fact, this would probably be a good time to do that, now that I know Danny really needs it."
Daniel went to the general's office and asked about the psychologist.
"Yes, we've made arrangements for a Doctor Meredith Woods to treat him. She is being briefed on the case and can begin on Saturday, if that works for you."
"Would it be done here or at her office?"
"Because of the classified nature of the case, doing it in her office is not possible. It can be done here or in your home."
Daniel thought about it. "I think at home would be better. I'm sure that Danny would feel more comfortable there."
Hammond nodded. "I will let you know the details once all the arrangements have been made."
Danny and Nesa were virtually inseparable for the rest of that day, the sharing of their emotions having bonded them in the pure, simple and unquestioning way that only children can bond.
Danny wanted Nesa to come home with them and was very disappointed when Daniel said she couldn't.
"But why not?" the boy asked.
"Well, because, for one thing, she's not human."
"Teal'c's not human either, but he can leave the base."
"Well, yes, but he's an adult. If something was to happen, he could deal with it. It just wouldn't be a good idea."
"So, she's gonna have to stay in a VIP room all by herself? She's not used to being by herself. She sleeps in the same tent as Neith."
"I'm sure she'll be just fine, Danny."
The boy frowned, not certain of that. "We could stay here tonight, then Nesa could stay with us in our room."
'Oh, yes, and then Neith will definitely blow my head off when she finds out I slept in the same room as her little sister,' was Daniel's first thought. Yes, Neith had been quite friendly to him in the infirmary that morning, but he doubted that she'd take kindly to him, or any other man, sharing a room with her sister, even if there was another child present.
"Uh, no, I don't think that would be a good idea, Danny. Her sister would not like that."
"Why not?"
"Because she doesn't know me all that well, and she's very protective of Nesa. If Nesa gets lonely during the night, she can go to the infirmary and be with her sister."
Danny was still frowning, but finally nodded. "Okay, I guess it's all right, then."
Shortly after dinner, Daniel took a seat on the couch, knowing it was time that he and Danny talked.
"Danny, come over here. We need to talk."
Seeing the serious look on the adult's face, Danny asked, "Did I do something wrong?"
"Well, yes, in a way, you did, but you're not in trouble, and I'm not mad." Daniel motioned for the boy to sit beside him. "Danny, I heard what you told Nesa, about trying not to cry and hiding it from me when you do."
Danny's eyes widened in alarm and dismay. "You weren't supposed to know!" he cried.
"Yes, I know. You didn't want me to be sad to see you crying."
Danny was now staring at his lap.
"Danny, I want you to listen to me. I love you, and, because I do, I want to know whenever you're sad. I don't ever want you to hide that from me. Yes, I'll be sad that you're sad, and, yes, I may worry about you, but that's also because I love you. It bothers me a whole lot more to know that you've been hiding your sadness from me than it would have bothered me to see you sad." He tilted the boy's face up and looked into eyes that were a younger version of his own. "So, I want you to promise me that you will never hide from me that you're sad."
"I promise."
Daniel smiled and pulled the child close, kissing the top of his head.
"I love you, Daniel, more than anybody, except Mom and Dad," Danny whispered.
Tears filled the archeologist's eyes. "And I love you more than anybody, you and Sam."
Danny drew back and gazed up at Daniel. "If you're ever sad, will you promise to tell me?"
Daniel didn't answer, the question catching him unprepared.
"If I need to tell you when I'm sad, then you should tell me when you're sad," Danny reasoned.
Crap. A child's logic and reasoning could be damn inconvenient sometimes. How could he refuse to make that promise?
"Um . . . okay. I promise."
"Good."
"Okay, now that we've both promised to be honest with each other about our feelings, have you been having nightmares that you didn't tell me about?" Daniel asked.
Danny's gaze was immediately back to his lap. "Sometimes."
"How often is 'sometimes'?"
"I don't know."
"Well, however often it's been, that's going to stop right now. If you have a nightmare, you tell me. If it's not a really bad one, then you can tell me in the morning, but if it's really bad, and you're crying, I want you to come into my bedroom and let me know."
"But that would make me a big baby," Danny objected.
"Where did you get that idea?"
"Only really little kids go running into their mom and dad's room when they have a nightmare or get scared at night."
Daniel honestly didn't know what to say to that. It was true that, by the time he reached his eighth birthday, he no longer sought safety in his parents' bed when he was frightened by a nightmare or something else. He had assumed that was normal for an eight-year-old.
"Okay, we'll compromise. If the nightmare is about something terrible happening to Mom and Dad or me, and it's really bad, you come into my room. We'll talk about it, then, when you feel better, you can go back to bed. For all other nightmares, you can wait till morning. Deal?"
It took a while for Danny to answer. "Deal," he finally said, rather reluctantly. "Will you be telling me about your nightmares?"
"Uh . . . no. Some of my nightmares are not things that you need to know about."
"Like what?"
"Just . . . scary things, sad things, sometimes things to do with missions that went bad and, um, other stuff I've been through in the past."
"Do you still have nightmares about Mom and Dad?"
"No, not in a long time." That was a nightmare he hadn't had since the incident with the Keeper. It had plagued him for a few nights after that, then faded away. Most of his nightmares now were about losing either Danny or Sam. And then there was that whopper he had after deciding to leave SG-1. Nope, Danny definitely didn't need to know about that.
Fortunately, Danny didn't press the issue. They watched TV for a while, then it was time for the boy to go to bed.
Daniel didn't get awakened by Danny that night, but the boy did confess the next morning that he had a nightmare. It was about their parents, but he insisted that it wasn't "really, really bad." Daniel wasn't certain of that, but let is slide. Danny was trying very hard to be grown-up about things now. It was what Daniel himself had done after his parents' death. The difference was that he didn't have someone to turn to, whereas Danny did.
Even before the death of his parents, Daniel had been pretty independent for his age, and he figured that Danny's attitude was an example of the same personality trait. Weeks ago, the boy had been far too emotionally fragile for that independence to manifest itself. Such was no longer the case.
Danny and Nesa spent a great deal of that day together. Daniel hung out with them for a while. Nesa's shyness had mostly dissipated in his presence, and the three of them had fun. Sam and Jack each stopped by to say hi.
While she was there, Sam happened to catch a look that Nesa gave Daniel when he wasn't looking and instantly recognized it for what it was. She hid her smile, wondering if Daniel had any idea that the young Jaffa girl had a crush on him. Probably not.
The next morning, Janet agreed that, though she still had healing to do, Neith was well enough to go home. An hour later, the Hak'tyl women were on the ramp, waiting for the gate to dial. Across from them were SG-1 and Danny.
"Will you come and visit?" Nesa asked Daniel.
"Yes, of course," he replied.
Smiling, Neith said, "My sister has developed quite an affection for you."
Sam saw the moment that comprehension dawned on Daniel's face. She repressed her smile with a great deal of effort. Teal'c didn't even try hiding his.
Nesa nudged Neith, embarrassed at her sister's revelation. "Neith," she whispered.
Daniel smiled, glancing at his teammates to see the smile Teal'c wore and the one Sam was fighting. He noticed that Jack was grinning. Oh, boy. He could probably expect to get some teasing about this.
Danny looked at Nesa sadly. He was really going to miss her. They might not ever see each other again.
"I'm going to miss you, Nesa," he mumbled, eyes downcast.
"I am going to miss you, too," the girl replied. "Could you not visit as well?"
Danny looked up at Daniel pleadingly. "Could I?"
"Um . . . I don't know, Danny. I'd have to get permission for you to go through the gate. I'll see what I can do."
A little shyly, Nesa stepped forward. Danny did as well, and the two friends hugged.
Ishta looked on, smiling at the sight. "We are grateful to our new friends." Her gaze went to the others. "On behalf of the Hak'tyl, I'd like to express our thanks."
"Our medical team will be checking in on a regular basis," Sam told her. "Be sure to take note of any symptoms that could be a side effect of the Tretonin."
"You have trained us well in the use of the medicine," Ka'lel said.
"The food and supplies you have provided will go far," Ishta stated.
"Well, if there's anything else you need, anything, just give us a call," Jack told them. "Send us an email."
Ishta, paying no attention to Jack, locked eyes with Teal'c. "Just that not so many moons go by before we see you again."
She and Teal'c stepped forward, went into each other's arms and began kissing.
Jack, totally oblivious to what was going on, responded, "Oh, don't worry. I'm sure we'll be in. . . ." He looked up and saw the lip lock that Teal'c and Ishta were in. Just then, the gate activated. "Touch," Jack finished, staring at the couple.
Daniel and Sam exchanged a glance, smiling. They looked down at Danny to see that he was grinning broadly. Taking him by the arm, Daniel turned and headed for the exit with Sam. Neith and Nesa smiled and went through the gate with Ka'lel. Jack, his eyebrows rising, made his own exit.
When Teal'c and Ishta finally stopped kissing, they were alone in the gate room. Not paying any attention to that fact, they drew apart. Ishta walked up the ramp to the event horizon. She turned around, bowed slightly, then stepped into the wormhole.
